FEARslave

Forever Endure Always Ready

Twitter & Insta @fearslave

BDSM is never just a play session or rougher sex to me, it's part of me. It has fundamentally shaped my life so far at every major turns good or bad, and probably will keep on doing so.

Mindset wise I guess I can call it modernized old-guard type - upholding traditional ideal with the new concepts of variety of relationships nowadays - W/we all fit into this hierarchical brotherhood of leather and kinky M/men while not limiting each of ourselves in a box. I was fully owned in an M/s living-in situation for four years and used part of every day like in a hardcore and dark bdsm porn after work, I doubt there will be another similar experience exceeding that or I want it again. A recent realization is that i’m always longing for a Big Brother figure in my life - not a typical Master i look for, more an alpha boy. Relationship wise I’m quite poly.

I have such a wide range of kinks and fetishes that listing what I'm *not* into is probably easier (namely scat, femininity and children). Basically a hanky code orange on the right kind of guy. Among all the things there are some fundamental ones I cannot live without:
—Chastity: can confidently say “AMA about it”. Been in it constantly for months and years. I think many people misunderstand who a keyholder is - it's not about locking it away and forgetting about it, instead it's fully taking advantage of the power of it. CBT, edging and denial are all part of it for me.
—Bondage: all kinds that's heavy and exposes me vulnerably. I appreciate rope bondage as an art, but for me bondage is a means not a goal - other things need to happen after I'm tied up as an object for use and abuse.
—Nipple play: they are pierced and I can cum by just rubbing them.
—Electro: I started to try it myself in junior high after physics class. From violet wand sparkles to TENS units to stun guns, I like them all, to the extent of leaving electric burn marks.
—Protocol: the stricter and the more comprehensive the rules are, the better structured my life is and the happier I am. It’s only fun when both sides put in the effort to uphold then, and I welcome/expect fair punishments to make me a better submissive man. Even it’s a weekend or one night out with a Dom, I’d love to know His protocols and follow them.
—Sexual usage: being used as a sex toy for sucking and fucking are just an integral part of my submission. I derive pleasure from the pleasure of my Dom. Of course I would enjoy whatever my body feels in the process of being used, including involuntary orgasms, but you’ll never find me jerking off myself while sucking a dick, or actively pursuing my own pleasure by “using” the Dom.
—Body worshipping: from lean/toned to muscular to dad bod, i admire a Man who has the discipline to take care of Himself. i love to worship a strong figure iand everything about it, cock, feet, armpits, scent, sweat, spit, cum, piss (i drink from tap and never waste a drop)…

A word about single-tail whipping - I have a reputation of taking heavy single-tail whipping, and I'm fortunate to have been whipped by some world-class practitioners. It was trained into me and not an intrinsic need, but I'm always up for one session with a skillful Dom and will proudly wear the marks and scars He left on me.

Fetishes: All my fetishes seem to be rooted in hyper-masculinity aesthetic. Uniform, leather, boots, sports, camo pants, or even just a deep voice or a buzz cut. Somehow rubber and spandex don’t do much for me.

There are a couple things that's so popular nowadays but not my thing although I don't mind trying: pup play and fisting.

Finally some thoughts on taboos: sexualizing and fetishizing any taboo to get off is a destruction and a perfect “fuck-you” to its original form/ideology and its real believers, so I don’t see any problem there and would happily engage as long as with consent.