from Recon News

15 April 2020

BOXERDADDY is a New York based fetishist, writer and author of 'The Puglist: Erotic Boxing Adventures' and 'The Puglist: Other Erotic Boxing Tales'. Boxerdaddy is an active amateur boxer, two time Golden Gloves champion and is also one of the founding fathers of ONYX NY/North East. ONYX is an organisation that supports ethnic and racial diversity in the gay leather community. For over 24 years, the organisation has worked to empower gay men of colour and allies providing education about the community, safe practices and history.

Where to start? It seems like half a lifetime ago. I was walking through Penn Station, in New York City, to their Video Game Arcade shop (yeah, that long ago). I was passing a newsstand when a boxing magazine caught my eye. It had the picture of a shirtless "Marvelous" Marvin Hagler, sporting a pair of gloves that read "WEAR HARD" on their cuffs. I found myself transfixed by the image. I couldn't look away for some reason. Eventually I did, but I found myself returning several times until, finally, I purchased the book. Looking through the pictures of half-naked, sweaty, battered, and bruised men, punching each other with puffy Everlast gloves, in bootie hugging shorts stirred something deep in my loins that I intimately liked. Having just passed puberty, I soon discovered that I could not watch boxing on TV with others, for fear of them seeing the ragin' hard on in my pants. This was truly an odd thing that I could NEVER tell anyone about. All of this was years before I had a clue to my sexual preference.

Fast track through the rest of the 80's and early 90's, where I was distracted by sex, drugs, rap music, military, and college; I was single in Atlanta when I took command of my life. Having come to terms with my sexuality, I decided to learn more about my secret turn-on, but where to look? Being in the Information Technology field, I turned to the anonymity of the Internet. Perhaps there were others who were aroused by this sport like me. And indeed there were. I found a Gay Boxing & Wrestling site where I could create a profile and discuss this with other like-minded men. There was even a section where members could post fictional stories online for others to read (Take a note of that for later). It was on that site that I chatted with a guy slightly bigger than me who was coming to town and wanted to fight me.


I was nervous, excited, terrified, and almost ready to piss my pants. Sure, I had been in a few bar room brawls in the military, but not a one-on-one fight in a Marquis De Queensbury established boxing rules style. I decided to memorize and perform the moves I had seen pro boxers do in their fights. Add that to my drive and tenacity and I would survive this. We met and he bloodied my nose while we fought to a standstill. I didn't go down, but I didn't win the fight either. But, something else happened. A seed was planted within me and it quickly grew! A month later, I joined a boxing gym and took formal lessons. It was like tossing a tadpole in water. Nine months later I got my revenge on that guy, stopping him in the second round. Still, he's the only gay boxer to EVER hold a win over me.

During all this I discovered ONYX: A Leather organization for Men of Color. Having realized that I had a specific fetish: where better to find other men like me than through a Leather group that catered to kinky men? Alas, I found none. But I did become comfortable enough to start wearing my boxing gear to dance parties and leather gatherings. I was slightly ahead of my time for gear fetish parties. Still it was always refreshing to hit a party and be the ONLY guy dressed in Boxing gear.

A few years after returning to New York, I became a Founding member for the NY Chapter of ONYX and became the 3rd winner of The Leatherman of Color title. Yeah, I was busy. All the while, still perfecting my sport and occasionally engaging other men in fights for dominance. But, it wasn't enough, and I yearned for more. From that first Gay Boxing/Wrestling site, I gathered the multiple short stories I had written into a book and self-published it: THE PUGILIST: Erotic Boxing Adventures. I sold EVERY copy. Even better, several men approached me to enact chapters within the book. Things could not get better. But, they did. Eight years later, I became the first DrummerNA (North America) and republished my first novel through Adynaton Publishing, along with rolling out the next installment of the Pugilist series: THE PUGILIST: Other Erotic Boxing Tales. This was a 'Game-Changing' moment. DrummerNA was a kink player's title and put my Fetish out there for the Int'l world to see! In fact, ONYX added the Heavy Impact Play kink to their pledge guide, and Boxers from across the globe sought me out to hear my story and often times fight.

Overall, I learned it is the thrill of the fight to determine the victor. When I box, ALL of my senses are on high alert and I feel truly alive. I'm tapping into a primitive aspect of my nature to be the "Alpha Male." When my gloved fist makes contact with another man's face, distorting his facial features for just a brief moment before rattling his brains inside of his skull, it sends direct signals to my sex drive. It is the repeated striking and gratifying grunts of hitting my opponent's abdomen that reach my cerebellum and fuel my dominant nature.

Over the years:

- I used a good friend as a punching bag on multiple occasions and filmed the scene for later pleasurable viewing, boxed nude: (A distracting act to my opponents that find their eyes focused on the wrong objective while boxing for stakes where the winner gets to complete his victory by fucking the loser. But is being the bottom actually losing?)
- I discovered I'm a gear whore. I have enough Boxing gloves, boots, and trunks to hold a tournament for 30 guys, and none of them would wear the same gear twice.
- I definitively know what I'm capable in the ring against another man, and, yes, I've boxed women before as well. Knowing how to punch helps me vary my power when striking another individual. Thus, my heavy impact play can last longer.
- I've won multiple amateur boxing titles over the years, including being a two-time NY Golden Gloves Master's champion, as of 2019.
- I'm continuing to introduce men to my world via a class I teach annually at CLAW (Heavy Impact Play: Erotic Boxing).

Lastly, as of the publication of this article, I've entered full-on Daddy mode, having two Boxer Boys (with possibly more on the way) that are learning the Sweet Science, while engaging in impact play under my tutelage and I have a new book being released shortly.

People often ask me, "How you can you be a gay boxer? Don't you like men?"

My response: "I do! That's why I'm always hitting on them."