MASTER GIACON: The man, the human, the empathy that dominates
22 September 2020
Master Giacon became interested in BDSM as a late teenager and learnt various practices through courses and workshops, eventually practicing BDSM in the European kink scene. His extensive knowledge and competence on almost all forms of BDSM practices allowed him to leave is occupation and dedicate himself to working full time as a Dom.
We often hear about the "true Master", the Alpha male who must respect all the characteristics of masculinity without allowing himself weaknesses, the one who does not need to show an understanding for differing experiences, as he is male from birth and cannot afford attitudes that are not in line with his role.
Many people are born with a very dominant nature and have been this way for as long as they can remember- but this is not enough to be The Good Master. It is not enough, because it takes a lot of skill, knowledge and experience to be able to control an intense domination session. A very important aspect, of which little is said, is empathy: it is often underestimated, but has a great impact on the depth and involvement of the sensory experience that I create during a session.
Empathy is the ability to immediately put yourself in another's person state of mind or situation. When I know what the person I'm playing with is feeling, everything is much more intense, both for me and for him. I can have full control over him by being able to understand his emotions. I know when it is the right time to increase and decrease pain and pleasure; I know how to dose every sensation and every moment to create the best "melody"; I am completely involved in what I am doing and my feelings become one with those of whom I am dominating.
While entering in deep connection with my sub, the outside world disappears. I find myself in a bubble where there is no one else: the stronger the connection, the stronger the feeling of union and isolation. It is a fulfilling and profound experience that I try to share and experience as much as I can, because it brings the satisfaction of the meeting between two people to the highest level.
In relationships, mental and emotional openness is fundamental, you have to get involved completely. To do this I have to get into the situation and be involved much more than those who submit. The more involved I get, the more I manage to let myself go completely in the moment. I abandon all fear and allow myself to feel the sensations that I am experiencing, in a state where I completely follow instinct and sense the feelings of my playmate. It is not always easy but when I succeed, what comes out is Perfection.
The difficulty is much higher during the first meeting and you don't know the person with whom you are going to play. If I meet someone for the first time, when he tells me about his past memory or his fantasy, I use all the empathy I have to understand what he felt.
Another key piece of information to ask for are the limits, because they can be connected to trauma, and if not respected they can cause an additional block to the pleasure of you both. It is essential to stress the importance of this requirement, as it will lead to him engaging more in the initial empathetic conversation.
Just above, I wrote "melody" and it is necessary that I explain: many people ask me how I feel pleasure when I am doing practices that require a huge effort and that do not give a direct sexual satisfaction. Faced with this legitimate question, I answer that I feel like a musician: my pleasure comes from the melody I create with my partner. The difference is that I do not play an instrument but the body, mind and soul. The knowledge of one's instrument is as fundamental as that of one's slave for a Master. The difficulty lies in the fact that, unlike an instrument, people change day by day. Precisely for this reason it is essential to develop empathy to better feel the sensations and emotions that are being experienced.
The best way to do this is to have tried the same or similar experiences. In this way, you are able to understand much better the sensations that you want to induce, and this is what I do in order to increase both my ability to tune and my experience.
The dominants who have had experience also as submissive can be much more empathetic, because they know what it feels like in the situation they are going to create and learn how to manage it at its best. They manage to increase the harmony with their partner and accompany them step by step in the discovery of the extreme pleasure.
It is time to let go of the stereotype of the tough and ignorant Male, to make way for one with greater awareness and knowledge of what he does. Do not be afraid to experience and feel new emotions, this will not make you less men, you will only become more "human", and you'll feel much more intense, deep and extreme sensations.