MEMBER ARTICLE: CNC - The (Most?) Controversial Roleplay

MEMBER ARTICLE: CNC - The (Most?) Controversial Roleplay

from Recon News

02 November 2021

By NikeShoxJock

When the #MeToo Movement began in America, it shook the entertainment industry to its core. Droves of (mostly) women bravely went public with accusations of sexual assault, harassment, and rape. To experience unwanted sexual activity from another person is horrifying. Men experience it, too. It has nothing to do with sex and sexual orientation, but everything to do with power. With that kind of power, the mentality of the person who yields it does not register consent as relevant criteria for anything sexual with another person. However, when consent is involved, the idea of consensually losing it is seductive.

What is CNC roleplay? CNC stands for 'consensual non-consensual'. It's otherwise known as the rape roleplay. It's dangerous. It's risky. It's unpredictable. And it is still highly stigmatized. CNC roleplay and the trust that comes with it is unparalleled, in my view. To get it right, and execute it properly is sensationally thrilling. However, the margin of error, according to critics, is too wide. Too many things could go wrong, especially if there isn't a safe word/phrase.

And just what is total powerlessness? Isn't that a slave's dream? For a total master and total slave, there is nothing as satisfying for both men than a carte blanche. But is there some way to obtain a higher thrill of submission? What if the slave weren't cognizant per se, of what was going to happen? Rather, what if he wasn't supposed to be?

American adult content sites like handle CNC roleplay very well. A hot, unsuspecting guy gets trounced upon and is violated sexually. Despite his screaming and yelling, he can't help but thrive on the violation. It's intensely erotic. In my early days of porn, when I was first introduced to this kind of sex, I fantasized about my teachers doing it to me. Pinning me over the desk and having their way with me. Throughout high school, the fantasy was a motif in my masturbatory endeavors. When I attended university, I marked that it was time to find someone ready and willing.

Before I did it, I spoke with friends about various sexual experiences, fetishes, and fantasies. CNC roleplay was the most controversial one within my group of friends, so much so that it led to fights, tears, and anxiety attacks. Some survivors of sexual assault, whether they're into kink or not, cannot bear to talk about it, even in euphemism. Others shame the desire, alleging it promotes the normalization of rape. I even heard stories wherein things had gone awry and without a safe word/phrase, the sub/bottom accused the dom/top of rape for not abiding by the predetermined rules. And, even with a safe word/phrase, I heard that sometimes dom/tops had gotten carried away – "too into it to realize what he was doing to me, no matter how much I cried out."

When enough trust was established between me and a casual partner, I brought up the idea and he was enthusiastic about it – not in a creepy way, but he was curious and willing. Having had sex many times before with him, we were both keenly aware of the other's limits and turn-offs. With that out of the way, it was time to plan. What was predetermined were a few rules: safe word, location, time of play, who's playing (just us, no additional partners), and generally what would go down. It was vital that I was only generally aware of what he was doing to me. The order in which he did what we agreed to was up to him and to which extent was up to him – as long as there was no permanent injury, temporary malfunction, or bleeding. We finalized the details and set everything up. When I told my friends about it. I received a lot of pushback and judgment. I was accused of bringing actual rape upon myself and promoting its normalization It's evident to everyone how prevalent sexual assault is on university grounds across the world. I understood the pushback. But I wanted to try it. I wanted to know what it would be like to be as powerless as possible in a consensual sexual context.

It was towards the end of my freshman year in college. He had a single dorm, whereas I lived with a roommate. So, his dorm was the location. Time: 9 P.M. Safe phrase: James Joyce (if you're familiar with the author you'll understand the connection).

I was "asleep" on his bed in his dorm wearing a tank-top, jeans and Nike Shox sneakers. The room was dimly lit by an adjustable lamp. He opened the door quietly and closed it quietly. Suddenly, I felt this heavy, muscular weight pin me down on the bed. This deep voice whispered, "You scream at all and I'm going to kill you." The next thing I knew, he used handcuffs to bind my arms to the posts of the bed. He went down to my sneakers and tied them together, tightly. Then, he blindfolded me. I was "allowed" to moan, groan, grunt, but nothing too loudly. He began to grope my cock and balls, making me erect in my jeans, then stood up and trampled them with his big black biker boots. The verbal degradation matched to what he was doing to my body. As the roleplay continued, he called me, "Cunt, bitch, sneaker slut, boy, asshole, Nike whore…" After the trampling, it was forced oral sex, deepthroating, intense kissing, slapping, foot worshiping. I intentionally wore a very old pair of jeans. He used scissors to cut them off me. He gagged me with my own sneaker as he tickled my feet. When the tickling ended, he left the sneaker on my face to cover my nose, not my mouth. Then he spanked me rough and hard, with his hands, his boots, and my sneakers. He sucked on my nipples and clamped them with clothespins. Then, without warning his tongue penetrated my hole and a load of lube opened it further. He finger-fucked me, starting with one finger and going up to nearly four. He stuck an anal plug in there and it vibrated in my hole as I blew him. He hadn't touched my cock yet and it was leaking, a lot. Without warning, I felt his cock plunge into me. He pounded me (with a condom). During the fucking, he took the blindfold off and my imagination couldn't compare to what my eyes were letting me see. He was wearing a facemask and a hat and while he fucked me, continuing the verbal degradation. He started jerking me off as he fucked me, but as I got close, he let my cock go. He pulled out and climaxed onto my chest. He jerked me off while finger-fucking me as I sniffed his boot. I climaxed all over my chest and he licked it all off. He got dressed, then handcuffed me back to the bed, retied my sneakers together on my feet, and left me there naked to soak in the experience for twenty minutes.

When he re-entered the room, we both said: "James Joyce". It was a great experience, and it was over. He uncuffed me, made sure I was ok, and handed me a glass of water. We sat together and had a very positive and productive discussion about how I felt, the boundaries we'd preset, what we both liked and what we thought needed changing.

Making certain that we'd established a trust, that boundaries were discussed, set, and agreed, and rules were established with a safe word/phrase provided the security I needed so I could enjoy this roleplay without trepidation. This, for me, was the most important factor.

I told my friends it was a positive experience. Some were happy, some weren't as judgmental, and others didn't want to hear about it at all.

This, arguably, remains to be the most controversial form of roleplay, and I hope the more we openly discuss this, and other forms of extreme roleplay, the more it becomes destigmatized.

***RECON: Play should always be Safe, Sane and Consensual. We know that members are involved in various forms of BDSM, or extreme forms of fetish play and roleplay. We've provided a 'SAFER PLAY' section on the website to help inform you about the choices you make, some of the possible risks and how to minimize them.

***If you'd like to share a fetish or kink experience in a member article, send your ideas or a first draft to: