It's a really old username from when I was in elementary derived from my initials and random numbers. I've been meaning to change it on recon for quite some time, but I haven't quite figured out one that represents my fetish and who I am now.
Tell us about your fetishes?
Well… there are quite a few. I frequently joke that my fetish is collecting new fetishes, haha. Predominantly, I'd say puppy play, bondage, and latex. Each provides a different release from the day-to-day stresses of life.
Puppy play was arguably the hardest kink for me to get into, in terms of headspace. I remember when I first saw pictures of pups on Tumblr, I was admittedly taken aback. It was the strangest fetish I had found up until that time, and I had no clue how anyone could be into it. But it slowly worked its way into the back of my mind.
"Well… I guess that puppy is a bit cute." "Aww man, that tail must feel amazing…" "I wouldn't mind if that pup gave me a bone." "Wow, I wish a Dom would put me that gear and force me to pup out."
…etc. At the time I was working on earning membership with the Phoenix Boys of Leather; I told my mentor that I was interested in being a pup. He pointed me to another pup who gladly put me in his hood and collar, and the rest is history. When I eventually found pup headspace, it was incredible. I felt the weight of the day shedding away, and adopted this innocent, yet horny pup mentality.
Rubber and bondage have always been fetishes of mine, even back when I was "straight". The tight, slick feel of rubber paired with rigid, unforgiving bondage has always been a match made in heaven. As time progressed, I sought out more coverage, more layers, more bondage - ideally not being able to move or squirm. I wanted to be forced to give in to the will of my captors, forced to endure endless edging or torture, and only allowed release when they deemed I had earned it. Rubber hits my interests in several aspects. I absolutely love the feel of rubber; sliding on a well-lubed catsuit is an experience in it of itself. I love it for the fashion, and for the dehumanization, and as a rubber pup, and even just to slip into it for a good ol' fuck. It's to the point that I travel with at least one piece of rubber and my pup hood everywhere I go, even when I travel for work.
In addition to those I've been exploring new fetishes and adding some to my growing list of interests. I'm slowly working on watersports and getting more and more into to it - to that end, I just ordered my first urinal hood from Studiogum and am excited (and terrified) for its arrival and christening. I've also added fisting to the list and while I don't expect it to become one of my primary fetishes, it is definitely something I enjoy with select people. Slave play is something that interests me; I'm typically a bratty sub, but there is something about giving up total control that is an immense turn on and I'm looking forward to exploring it further. Lastly, I've been working with a couple of very close friends to broaden my experience as a switch and improve my skills as a dominant. So someday Dom Top Scout may actually be a thing, who knows?!?
How did you get into fetish and kink?
Porn. Definitely porn.
Looking back, my childhood fondness for playing Cops and Robbers (and intentionally losing/getting caught as the robber) was certainly a sign of things to come. As an adult I can still remember stumbling onto Kink.com (the straight section) and being so enamored with what was happening in each scene. It took me a while to figure out that I was only watching the men submitting, which led to watching Bound Gods. I envied the subs. I craved the abuse and bondage that these other subs suffered. A few months after, I found Recon.
I was struggling with my sexuality at the time, due to a religious upbringing, but I had been chatting with a great guy near my hometown. After a while, I finally decided to take the plunge and had my first real bondage scene. He put me in an amazing leather sleepsack from Mr. S Leather; I can still remember how warm it was, the smell of sweaty leather, the feel of the grain rubbing against my body with every squirm. The hour and 45 minutes that I was in the sleepsack was the first glimpse at my own little slice of heaven, and I was hooked. I looked for more friends to explore with, for community with A-PAH (Arizona Pups and Handlers) and PBoL (Phoenix Boys of Leather), for new experiences to help me grow, and I haven't looked back since.
I've been fortunate to form bonds with a few that I consider my kinky family, and I feel so blessed with where I am currently.
What do you love about full restraint?
This one is easy - giving up control. It's knowing that I have given up complete control to someone I trust. I'm giving up a piece of myself and letting them take the reins. It doesn't matter if I want to get off, or if I want that other hit of poppers, or if I want the post orgasm torture to stop. I'm really giving up my control to their will and trusting they will do what's best for me. Giving up control, and allowing myself to be fully restrained, gives me (coincidentally) a sense of freedom.
I love the inescapability that bondage provides. When I'm unable to escape or resist, I'm able to drift into this cathartic state that I find so relaxing.
Is there anything you've not tried yet that you'd like to?
I'd love to be placed in a vac-cube or vac-tower. I've been in a vac-bed and it was heavenly. I can only imagine what it might be like to add more dimensions. Also being stuck on a milker for hours, having load after load milked from me. And possibly a weekend as a live-in slave - constantly kept in full coverage rubber and bondage, locked in chastity, and hole always plugged. I can't say I'm too sure how feasible that one is, but a pup can dream!
What do you go for in a guy?
I don't think there's a magic formula for what I look for in a guy. I feel I verge more on demisexual; where my sexual attraction is wrought from strong emotional bonds. While it isn't always the case, this tends to be the kinky friendships that make a difference for me. Outside of that, a willingness to explore is a must. I'm on Recon to expand my horizons, meet new friends who share common interests, explore my love of gear, and find new ways to get tied down for even longer amounts of time.
Describe the best encounter you've had through Recon
That's really hard. I've met so many friends on and through recon and had several amazing and different scenes, it's impossible to compare them. That said, here's one of my favorites...
There was one scene that I was ordered to show up in already in my rubber. At the front door, I was to shed the layer of clothing I had covering it, put on my hood, as well as the gag and blindfold hanging on the doorknob, and then get down on the knees. I felt like I was there forever, knelt at his door. Finally, I heard the door unlock, a leash and a collar were locked on my neck, and I was led blindly inside. He undid my codpiece and locked a chastity device on me, letting me know that it wasn't going to be used at any point in the night. The cage suddenly felt very tight, as I strained rather uncomfortably.
The night became a blur, as I was switched from various bondage positions; a tight rubber sleepsack with a gas mask force-feeding me poppers, strapped in a leather straitjacket and tied on a fuck-bench as he toyed with my hole, put in rigid irons in his shower and pissed on. He allowed me to service him and help him get off, all the while locked and horny.
When he was finally finished with me, he sent me home locked, still horny and throbbing in my cage.
What's the best thing about being kinky?
I feel like kink relationships have prepared me to be more open with a partner. After asking someone to put me in full rubber, tie me down, piss down my throat, and blow a load on my face… opening up emotionally to the ones I love is considerably less daunting. Not to say that it isn't hard, but because so much of kink is based on negotiation and proper discussion it enables me to.... As kinksters, we practice communication so we can do what we do, as safely as possible. I think it helps propagate a sense of trust and community, which is absolutely invaluable.
If you're interested in sharing your fetish journey in a Recon interview, apply by sending your Recon username to: firstname.lastname@example.org