Lifestyle Dominant and professional sex educator – Master Dominic – helps to answer members' questions and provide advice to those exploring BDSM and fetish relationships.
I'm really interested to try electrostimulation, but I'm a bit worried about how to do it safely. I've read a lot about not putting it above the waist etc but then seen people contradicting that, so I was hoping you'd be able to clear some of it up and recommend a starter kit/toys?
Thanks a lot, Jeremy
Master Dominic responds:
Electrostimulation is one of those kinks that used to be locked behind a (rather eye watering) pay wall, but there's been a lot of progress in making the control boxes cheaper, easier to use and safer, so I'm glad to see people wanting to try it out. There are a few house keeping tips to bear in mind when experimenting with it, but it's definitely not as scary as it sounds.
So, the most important issue: safety. There is A LOT of debate about whether or not you can safely use electro above the waist – the reason there's this concern is that the attached electrodes (toys) need to create a circuit. Creating a circuit that passes through/near the heart is probably as much of a good idea as it sounds. However, some people are adamant that it carries no risk and enjoy having their nipples zapped with wild abandon.
The thing here, for me, is that I'd be an irresponsible sex educator if I recommended doing something that could pose any kind of risk. In the same way that I advocate condom use and regular testing, it's in no way a judgement on people who don't subscribe to my way of thinking, but I'd be remiss in my duties if I was flippant about it. So, I do not recommend using electro above the waist. I'll never forget the time I had a session scheduled with a gorgeous silver fox and, upon arriving at my place, I asked if he had any health concerns I should be aware of. His reply was a nonchalant "Not really, no. I did have a pacemaker fitted a few years back, but I'm otherwise healthy. Can you electrocute my nipples?" - seriously. I'm no expert on pace makers but that sounds like an absolutely terrible idea to me. I fisted him instead.
Next, you need to select a control box that's a good fit for you. I'm terrible with technology, so anything that feels too high-tech turns me off, personally. I recommend the E-Stim 2B box – user friendly, simple, great customer support, loads of settings and won't cost you the best part of a grand. The website tells you which cables you need for each electrode (as previously mentioned, electrode is the fancy speak for a toy to plug in to the box) and so everything is easy and simple. There are loads of smaller boxes which are cheaper and have less functions on them too – DO NOT BUY THEM FROM CHEAP ONLINE STORES. They're badly made and easily malfunction. You do not want dodgy electrics on your cock! If you can, go into a sex shop and ask for a demo – there are loads of stores that stock electro worldwide. Some might not be able to offer demonstrations on the spot, but there are often events and in-store evenings at all kinds of sex shops featuring staff from brands to demonstrate their product, so keep an eye out for those when they're available to attend. Electro is definitely one of those things that seems much more complicated than it actually is, so having it demonstrated for you is an excellent way of achieving the "ah, I get it!" moment; that's what I did. If you don't have a retailer near you or you don't like the idea of going into a store, I'd always advise buying online directly from the company who manufacture the products. The staff working there are always massively knowledgable, happy to help and are always really good at translating any technical jargon into easily understandable language. If you're going to take my recommendation of the E-Stim 2B (or any E-Stim product, for that matter) their website is incredibly helpful – at the bottom of the page for each product there will be a selection of appropriate wires for the electrodes you've selected, an option to add electro lube (recommended!) to your cart with the item and so on. They even have a handy little infographic breaking down what the different wire types are and even a dedicated "useful links" and "information" page. I'd go for any of their starter kits that catch your eye – they come with the appropriate wires for the kit you've selected so there's no possibility of not being able to play with your new toy when it arrives because you didn't buy the right wires. Easy!
As far as electrodes themselves go, you really can't go wrong with a pair of cock ring loops, a few packets of adhesive pads and a butt plug. If you're playing with pads, definitely pick up some electro-specific lube. There are loads of brands which are affordable and effective – they might seem like an unnecessary add on, but they're actually fantastic for conducting electronic pulses whilst also keeping things moist. Adhesive pads are mono polar which means you need two to create a circuit, so I'd place one on each testicle, or one on the perineum and one on the scrotum, and so on. Placement can be tricky to get just right, especially if you're using adhesive pads, so I'll often get the person I'm zapping to place the pads on their bits themselves. They'll naturally stick/place/clamp toys on the areas they'd usually pay attention to when masturbating, so that takes the guess work out for you. Combine that with a butt plug (which are often bipolar, meaning you only need one toy and wire attached to get it to work – super simple) and that's a really effective combination of zaps you've got, all focussed on his most sensitive parts.
To make for an excellent electro experience you need to ensure that you start on a low, relatively constant setting. By constant, I mean something like "continuous" or whatever your box calls it – no sudden jumps or fluctuations in intensity. Ask the recipient to tell you when they can feel a tingle; for some people that's at 10%, for others it's at 70%, so this gives you a way to gauge your current partner. A tingle is good, an "OW THAT SUCKS" zap isn't!
Now your electrodes are in just the right place, you've figured out the strength and you're on a basic, consistent setting – get experimental! I can't quite tell you how to go from here, it often depends on your partner. Some like a gentle, low, constant pulse – others like a strong shock which fades to a low rumble. That's the fun! Some love using electro as a torturous sensation whilst others love to implement it in predicament bondage - I'm a big fan of turning it up if my sub makes too much noise while I'm playing with other parts of their body, for example. It's all up to you from here! Enjoy getting your zap on…
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